I'm Back (sorta)

Hi ya friends!
Its been so long. I had a very rough time these last 5 months. I was diagnosed with chronic headache/migraine disorder and had some CRAZY with all caps PMS symptoms, perimenopausal perhaps.  The up side is I have some preventative meds that are working well, some bioidentical hormone therapy that is preventing the crazies and I'm feeling MUCH better.
Thank you all for the kind words you posted when i was so unwell.
I am continuing my volunteer work at the animal rehabilitation center and my sub work at the kids school. I am making a Harry Potter Monopoly game for my daughter and a Hunger Games (Mocking Jay) jean jacket for same daughter. We just bought a house so I am purging the house of years worth of crazy purchases and starting to box up the rest! I don't know when I will blog next but I wanted to touch base and say hello to everyone and let you know that I 'm still enjoying your blogs and facebook status updates.
xoxo

updates

Hello Lovelies!
I've been AWOL for a while and I've missed so many of your daily adventures!
Congratulations Kelly on your epic weight loss and your bikini!!! You are awesome.
Holly, I'm sorry to hear about your Nana.
Here is the latest with me. Since Nov. 2011 I've been suffering from a variety of symptoms from migraines, anxiety and palpitations to daily headaches and hormonal craziness.  In addition to everything else that life throws at you.
 I have now been diagnosed with Daily chronic headache and menstrual migraine. I have fallen into a bit of a depression wondering if I will ever feel "good" again. I was frustrated that I couldn't do everything that I wanted to do and that I wasn't having painfree days, and I worried about how I would manage the future if it involved daily pain. However, I have found a new medication that is helping with the daily headache and so far haven't had a migraine in 2 weeks , although the medication makes me bone -weary, exhausted for several hours a day, I'm trying to learn when I can take it so that it minimizes the headaches but also minimizes the exhaustion.  I am grateful though for so many things as I have met many people on fb who suffer so much worse than I do, with chronic debilitating migraine pain and terrible side effects from the medication they take,   People who don't have the money to pay for their meds, who's insurance doesn't cover the number of meds they need, people who don't have family/friends who will help them, people who have been living with this terrible disease far longer than I have.
I don't know what the future holds for me, for my headaches/migraines, my quest to become a Holistic Health Practitioner, to become a home owner. I do know that right now i'm not in a place to continue blogging. I won't continue to blog when I'm feeling unhappy/scared/unsure... I don't want to burden all of you with these feelings - we all have our demons to overcome. So when I am in a better place I will return and hopefully you'll still be around.
Happy summer to all of you!!

Quickie

Okay - migraines are gone for this month. I have 3 choices to make before my TOM to try to control the migraines. A birth control with hormones that flux, this is what I was on for YEARS, it allows me to go period free for 3 months at a time, thus avoid the hormonal migraines, a birth control with fixed hormones that many migraineurs have had luck with - nuva ring. Anyone tried it? Down side, a period every month but this will probably be my first try. Then the crazy one, procardia, a bp med that is used as a migraine preventative BUT and here's the insane part, I have LOW bp, like 91/63. So if I take a bp med it may lower my bp even more, FUN FUN FUN, then I may pass out - did I tell you I suffer from occassional anxiety?! But its ok 'cause I'll probably have to take a salt pill to raise my bp to counteract the preventative! Look out birth control here I come.
I still have chronic tension headaches but I can manage these.
Lately I've been reminded of how lucky I am to be able to take a pill to get rid of my migraines.  My mom's friend and neighbor died 4 months after being diagnosed out of the blood with pancreatic cancer, I learned of two young boys at my kids school who are battling cancer, I learned of a young mom near us who was diagnosed with ALS while pregnant 2 years ago.... So today, I feel good so I will ROCK this day on the bad days I will baby myself and not feel badly about it!
In 30mins my mom and dad (who are in town, YEAH) and I will garage sale, then I'll take my dd to tennis lessons and then I will finish a paper, the last one to renew my teaching certificate AND then I can get into my holistic health practitioners box of books, dvds, cds..... to start myself down my new path. 
A few more random things, my friend Lanie Panie is on a new path too, if you are interested in health check out her blog http://healthyschmealthy.blogspot.com/2012/06/after-2-12-weeks-of-iin-training.html

Kelly has inspired me to press the checkout button at Athleta.com to buy this cute skirt that makes me feel FUN, in razzle purple http://athleta.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=46842&vid=1&pid=214985

Here is my most pinned pin on pintrest this week. http://pinterest.com/pin/86131411593920966/

Have a great weekend lovelies!!

Bad Days again

I have to write this here because I can't do it anywhere else.  today was day 6 of migraine world. they go away for a day  but they come back and the postdrome fog and depression is bad, now my neck aches from all the migraines and my emotions are so unstable I can't stop crying which makes my head hurt and that makes me cry more.  My doctor says I will stable out when my hormones stable out but I feel that i might go crazy before that happens. I want to take the birth control pill again b/c they'll make the migraines go away for a bit, yes I know they are a class 1 carcinogen but even cancer sounds better than the emotional hell I've fallen into. CRAZY with all caps I know.

Tonight my youngest has a double header ball game, then another game tomorrow, I have to help with field day tomorrow and then drive my oldest to a competition all day Saturday.  Maybe these responsibilities are a good thing, otherwise I might curl up in my bed all day long.  Where did the happy days of good health go?

Have a good day my blogger friends, I'm off to fight the craziness, maybe it'll help to keep moving (teacher gifts to buy, baseball gloves to buy, hair to cut/highlight, toes to paint, knox to buy for synchro, house to clean, paper to write for course - there really isn't time for crazy).

Just a quick edit not - I'm starting to feel a little better, no more tears for now. Getting some shit done.

Whatcha Reading

I don't have a WTF Wednesday like Laura and Drazil - except for a WTF is with th e4 migraines I've had in the past week. Enough already! HORMONES!!!! Seems I'm not in perimenopause after all, I'm fertile as ever. WTF that's scarier than starting early menopause!!!

I'm trying something a little different here. In an attempt to avoid the 2 courses I have to finish (not my health practitioner courses) I am reading. Here's what's on my kindle today.

So, I recently finished the story of Scott Bolzan, "My Life Deleted"
He is an ex NFLer who slips in the bathroom at work and winds up with the worst case of retrograde amensia his doctors have ever seen.
To the best of my knowledge he still hasn't regained any of the memories of his life before 2008! FREAKY! Its an interesting story of becoming aware of yourself. Inspiring.

I have also succombed to the hype that is "50 Shades of Grey"
After hearing many ladies talk about how great this book is supposed to be, erotica, porn for women..... I decided it certainly couldn't hurt, and could possibly help (if you know what I'm saying!) so I bought the kindle copy.
So 85pgs into the book (which has 514), I'm interested. Christian Grey is THE man. So far nothing earth shattering but  the author paints a very controlled, in charge, confident picture of this man that I'm falling for him too. Strangely, I keep picturing him with grey hair even though he's described as having copper colored hair. Maybe its the title. Have you read it yet?  I'm not sure about it, as I flip through the pages I'm catching snippets of dominence.....  but that's about 30 pages from where I am so I'll update you as I go.

Bunch of Randomness

 Ahhh its been a while. We've been crazy busy with sports. Here's my little man at the plate. He hit a double the other day and he's the youngest on the team. Most of the boys are a year older. Proud Mama!!

This is his very cute, very young coach.

I feel so old. At least I'm not old enough to be his mom (almost but not quite).

These are my babies. They were orphaned and now we're fostering them. The little critters need to be fed every 1hr! What the hell was I thinking!!!!!!

Health stuff

I've been doing really well now that the doc suggested I use progesterone cream as I'm off the bc pill. Its been helping alot with the anxiety I used to get and the headaches but yesterday I got a migraine and dumb ass that I am, I tried to use 2 excedrin and then extra magnesium and then a peppermint stick to get rid of it b/c I don't like taking prescript meds. Well of course I ended up having to take the max dose of my migraine pills and then had palps all night. I think I slept from 1:30 - 4:30 only. Needless to say I'm an emotional basket case this morning. I still don't have my bloodwork results back from my doctor but my hormones are definitely doing something crazy.

I have school work to do, and not the fun, holistic kind I'm so excited to start - here's the box of books that arrived on Sat!! I'm being disciplined and not opening it until I finish the other two!

A New Direction

I have been a teacher for almost 18 years.  I am finishing up 2 online courses to renew my teaching certificate in this state, as I used to teach in Canada.  I'm not ready to give up on my chosen career after spending soo much time, energy and $$ getting here but I amd moving in new directions.
After a variety of crazy minor health experiences this past year I've come to realize how much I value healthy alternatives to modern medicine. Believe me I'm not against modern medicine, I have lots of fabulous, reliable meds in my cabinet but I love that I have choices through Eastern medicine that can help much of what plagues me.  SO I am going back to school (online, study in my pjs school) to become a Holistic Health Practitioner, GCNM.
I'm so excited to learn more about vitamins, minerals.... Here are the modules I get to study.

Module I
Basic Human Anatomy
Medical/Herbal Botanical Terminology
Toxicity and Detoxification
Dietary Guidelines

Module II Orthomolecular Nutrition
Weight loss
Alternative Healing Methods
Alternative Diagnostic Methods

Module III Environmental Medicine
Energy Work
Body-Mind Medicine
Drug-Herb-Vitamin Interactions

Module IV Common Ailments: Prevention and Treatment
History of Herbal Medicine
Eastern Medicine
Western Herbal Medicine

Module V Botany and Plant Identification and Harvesting
Making Herbal Remedies
Materia Medica/Therapeutic Herbalism
Business Procedures & Jurisprudence

Module VI Case Studies Consultant’s Guide to Analysis

I get to make herbal remedies in Module V and I have to send one in for grading!! All I can think about is Potions class in Harry Potter (I'm such an HP geek). 

My box of books and CDs.... should arrive in 1 week. Can't wait to show you everything I get!!!